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October 18, 2011 at 9:27 pm ET
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Odds are You Won’t Find these Bets in Vegas

Forget the traditional “Who will hit the first home run,” or “be named MVP” of World Series bets. Sometimes you’ve got to think outside the box, and the following may not always be something you’ll see on Las Vegas betting boards.

Having said that, perhaps some of these wagers are more your speed. As the house, we lay the odds, whether you want action is up to you…

ODDS

  • Some Cardinal goes Jason Grimsley and sprinkles “powdered sugar” over the pastries in the Rangers’ breakfast spread before Game 1, just to “have some fun” with Josh Hamilton and Ron Washington: 50-1
  • Conversely, the odds of Hamilton squiring Tony La Russa about Arlington and sharing enough of his “ginger ale” that the manager wakes up in a trunk: Also 50-1
  • La Russa has something to bitch about at the conclusion of the Series opener: 1-10
  • A twitchy Albert Pujols summons a seamstress in the visitors clubhouse at Texas, scans said locker room with darting eyes, then whispers “I take a 48 long. Know what I’m sayin’?”: 25-1
  • Either Texas or St. Louis would conduct their own version of the “Boston Tea Party” and the brew of choice would be PBR: 2,000-1

(The major league minimum is $414,000. C’mon, you’re better than that.)

  • Josh Beckett, Jon Lester and John Lackey re-enact old times for each Fall Classic contest: 2-1
  • Matt Holliday gets drilled: By a pitched ball 3-1; By a batted ball 1-2
  • Bengie Molina throws out a first pitch before Game 3. Rocking a Rangers jersey. Texas’ way of “Just fuckin’ with ya, little brother”: 5-2
  • C.C. Sabathia pulls an A-Rod and opts out of his contract in same game: 10-1
  • I blow a blood vessel knowing that Kyle Lohse is starting a World Series game: Guaran-fucking-teed

Over / Under

  • Home runs hit by Nelson Cruz: 17
  • Times FOX will mention that Adrian Beltre is not fond of having his head touched before you start banging on your own: 2.5
  • Times Nick Punto slides head-first into first base: 2.5
  • Times McCarver predicts something, then the opposite happens: 14.5
  • Replays of Endy Chavez’s catch from Game 7 of the 2006 NLCS every time he hauls in a fly ball, pinch-runs or grabs some seeds: 1.5
  • FOX promos for their “ambitious” new thriller Terra Nova: 243
  • Number of times you actually watch it: 0.5
  • Times Buck will use the exact phrase “Could this be the final at-bat of Albert Pujols’ Cardinals career?”: 3.5
  • Times Buck sounds like he does not know / care where he is: 147
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