Remember the Ford Pinto? It was a little piece of crap, death trap, of a car that I think just about every high school kid in America drove back in the ’70s.
It wasn’t worth a damn.
Apparently, it still isn’t. It was a crappy car, though my friend Matt loved his and would disagree. Nowadays, the Pinto seemingly can’t be trusted to give sound opinions on baseball, either.
Sporting News baseball writer David Pinto seems to be floating the idea that the best starting rotation in the American League East belongs to — get ready for the punchline here — the Tampa Bay Rays.
Pinto, whose name has apparently affected the size of his brain, goes so far as to say Tampa Bay “stands a good chance of becoming the class of the AL East.”
I’ll take a short break now until you are done laughing. Go ahead, get a tissue, dry those tears. I will wait until you are ready to keep reading.
OK, done now? Let’s proceed.
Pinto, the brainiac, uses the PECOTA projections to come to his brilliant conclusion. I know you stat heads will kill me for this, but all you need to know about the usefulness of the PECOTA projections is that they allow somebody to come to the conclusion that Tampa Bay has better starting pitching than Boston, New York or even Toronto.
Pinto figures the rotations to be as follows:
Red Sox: Josh Beckett, Daisuke Matsuzaka, Tim Wakefield, Jon Lester, Clay Buchholz
Yankees: Chien-Ming Wang, Andy Pettitte, Mike Mussina, Phil Hughes, Ian Kennedy
Blue Jays: Roy Halladay, A.J. Burnett, Dustin McGowan, Shaun Marcum, Jesse Litsch
Rays: Scott Kazmir, James Shields, Matt Garza, Andy Sonnanstine, Jason Hamel
The Orioles, apparently, don’t count in Pinto’s world. Seems even he is smart enough to figure out that they stink.
I will grant you that, potentially, the Rays have a nice top three with Kazmir (if his arm doesn’t fall off), Shields and Garza. But, Sonnanstine and Hammel? Not to mention the fact that no pitcher on that staff has ever approached the production of Beckett and Matsuzaka, Wang, Pettitte and Mussina or even Halladay and Beckett.
I guess I know who I won’t be reading when I want solid baseball information.
Some advice — stay away from the Pinto.