Your friends here at Bugs&Cranks are big fans of the Baseball Prospectus. Even if they didn’t send us freebies this year and offer us author interviews, we forked out a little cash and bought a few copies. But really, you can have your PECOTA and your VORP and your BABIP to predict who’ll do what in 2014. Enjoy yourselves, mathletes.
Because Bugs&Cranks has psychics.
Yep. HollywoodPsychics.com got in touch and asked if we had any questions about what might happen in the 2014 baseball season. (Cue the Shoshanna Shapiro voice: “Um … ye-ah!”) And let me just tell you, this isn’t some fly-by-night hoodoo operation. It’s not Madame Sabrina, out by the airport. It’s Hollywood, amigos. The Bugs put their heads together and, when they managed to knock it off with the wisecracks for two minutes, they assembled half a dozen questions for the Hollywood Psychics.
Below are our questions (in bold) and their prescient, psychic, tell-you-the-future answers.
You’re welcome. And eat it, Prospectus. Here goes:
Which free agent will have the greatest impact on his new team?
Shin-Soo Chooâ€™s 7-year $130 million deal with the Texas Rangers. The Rangers had a disappointing 2013 season and Chooâ€™s gritty style at the plate will help remind other Rangers players what it means to grind it out.
Which big-contract player will have the most disappointing season?
Ellsburyâ€™s 7-year $153 million signing to the Yankees will be a huge disappointment. He is a good player but not as a Yankee, and not after winning the World Series as a Red Sox the year before joining the Yankees. There is bad karma oozing out of this signing. The Yankees are not in the position to make a run for the pennant this year and the team will implode, making the money they spent on Ellsbury a waste.
There hasn’t been a general manager fired since 2011. Will that change this season and if so, who goes first?
The Philadelphia Phillies had two very disappointing seasons in 2012 and 2013. After firing manager Charlie Manuel mid-season last year, GM Reuben Amaro Jr., is on the hot seat. The fans of Philadelphia recognize the lack of talent in their farm system and have no desire to become the next Yankees or the east coast version of the Dodgers, trying to buy a championship. Amaro Jr., will be fired in June or July of 2014 due to a poor start by the Phillies.
Which Toronto Blue Jay will be the first to get injured in 2014?
Jose Reyes, but he will only miss a few games and go on to have a solid season. Then again, anything is better than his 2013 season.
Who will be the next player to hit 60 home runs in a season?
Mark Trumbo, but not this year and not with his current team, the Arizona Diamondbacks. Look for him to be dealt to an American League team in 2015 and make a major impact in 2015 against a whole crop of AL pitchers that have not faced him before.
This is Bud Selig’s final year as MLB Commissioner. What can we expect from his last tour of duty, and what changes are to come with the change in regime?
Bud paid close attention to Chipper Jones’ retirement in 2012. Chipperâ€™s farewell tour saw him receive retirement presents from every team he visited during his last year, and it was easy to see he was a special person to everyone in the majors. Bud will look to replicate Chipperâ€™s farewell tour but will come up short in the end. While he may be well received on the outside, there will be a lot of mixed emotions on the inside. Bud presided over MLB through one of its darkest periods, the steroid era, a black mark on all of baseball that can never be forgotten. However, Bud also helped many teams build new ballparks, making the game-day experience special again for a new era of fans. Many players and owners will show appreciation and focus on this as his crowning achievement, while trying to overlook his role in the steroid era.
A new regime will look to do two things in the short term. They will incorporate more technology into baseball to allow for in-game play review. Never again should a perfect game be missed because of a blown call by an umpire. The new commissioner will also look to make sure Alex Rodriguez disappears from baseball for good. A-Rod has become a constant reminder of all that was wrong with baseball in the 90â€™s and 00â€™s. He makes Pete Rose look like an extremely attractive pick for the Hall of Fame. A-Rod is a new version of low and shame in the MLB. The new commissioner will want to start fresh and to do so will mean A-Rod is out of the picture for good.
* Â Â * Â Â * Â Â * Â Â * Â Â *
If you’re in the market for a psychic reading, you can’t do better than Hollywood Psychics. A big Bugs salute to them. Call them yourself. Check them out atÂ http://www.
Leave a Reply
- A Heartwarming Holiday Tale of Authorized Amphetamines by Patrick Smith
- Nationals Enjoy the Calm Before the $torm by Duke Jackson
- The stones to gather Moss by Keith Good
- Not for (Fire) Sale by Steve St. Angelo
- The Passion of the Konerko: A 1-Act Play by Paul Czarnowski