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November 18, 2008 at 8:00 pm ET
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Meet Evan Grant, your yearly MVP-voting moron

As I’ve said on numerous occasions, I think individual awards like the MVP are crap, because every sportswriter comes up with their own definition of “most valuable.” That’s fine, really. I have no problem if someone doesn’t think that Dustin Pedroia is one of the 10 most valuable players in the American League. What I do have a problem with is stupid, inexplicable inconsistency.

Case in point: Evan Grant of the Dallas Morning News. On Sept. 20, Grant wrote a column listing his candidates for American League MVP.  He had Kevin Youkilis listed as the player worthy of his MVP vote. And who’d he list as fourth? Dustin Pedroia. Here’s the direct excerpt from Grant’s column:

Though our ballot for AL Most Valuable Player (the only award for which we officially vote) doesn’t have to be sent in for another week, here’s a look at our choices if we had to cast them now:

American League: Kevin Youkilis, Boston

Comments: One school of thought is Dustin Pedroia’s peskiness atop the order makes the Red Sox go. He may win the batting title, but batting titles don’t mean what they once did. This is the age of on-base percentage and on-base-plus-slugging, and Youkilis leads his teammate in both categories, by a whopping margin in OPS. He’s also hitting .360 with runners in scoring position.

The full ballot: 1. Kevin Youkilis, Boston; 2. Justin Morneau, Minnesota; 3. Francisco Rodriguez, Los Angeles Angels; 4. Dustin Pedroia, Boston; 5. Josh Hamilton, Texas; 6. Carlos Quentin, Chicago White Sox; 7. Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees; 8. Cliff Lee, Cleveland; 9. Joe Mauer, Minnesota; 10. Grady Sizemore, Cleveland.

Sometime between Sept. 20 and the end of the season (yeah, a week later), Pedroia had apparently broken into Grant’s house, crapped in his ice box, pissed in his ice tray, and turned his dog queer. How else do you explain this: In voting released today, Grant didn’t have Pedroia listed among his top 10 candidates. That’s right, he excluded the American League MVP from his ballot completely.

Haha, Evan Grant, you are the clown who proves the theory: INDIVIDUAL AWARDS ARE CRAP, because they’re voted on by inconsistent poo-poo heads like you.

Here’s what Grant wrote today, in advance of the vote’s announcement:

I think the award should go to Youkilis. His offensive numbers save for overrated batting average, dwarfed those of Pedroia. When Mike Lowell got hurt, Youkilis moved from first to third and provided the Red Sox with excellent defense. And he led Boston back to the playoffs.

I’m speculating, of course, but it seems clear to me that Grant felt so strongly about Youkilis’s candidacy that he tried to undermine Pedroia.

I guess we have to admire a man for trying to make himself more important than a bullshit system…and failing miserably.

Maybe next year, Evan.

**Update: Here’s Grant trying to explain to the boys at WEEI how Pedroia, whom he said was his choice as MVP (as late as mid-September!), slipped from his ballot completely.**

http://audio.weei.com/m/audio/21467869/evan_grant.htm

They roast this guy, and yet they don’t even bring up his Sept. 20th column, which is the biggest piece of evidence for his inconsistent stupidity.

Cam Martin also writes for CBS Sportsline and Comcast SportsNet New England.

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