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December 31, 2010 at 7:07 am ET
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I Need to Put This in and Around my Mouth

From the blog of MLB.com’s Benjamin Hill comes news of the “Three Dog Night” — the only reason to consider attending an Akron Aeros home game in 2011. Or ever go to Ohio, for that matter.

The Double-A affiliate of the Cleveland Indians has taken on the daunting challenge to somehow make the Midwest even fatter than it already is by announcing its intention to issue this gorgeous and slightly-insane coming-together of three sausages, sauerkraut and spicy mustard. Food porn below.


I haven’t seen this much meat shoved between two white buns since I mistakenly Googled “Aurora Snow” before a trip to Illinois last February.

Anyway, to break down the meat schematics furthermore, the Three Dog Night features a hot dog set inside a brat, which is set inside a kielbasa. It, as Benny Hill’s post mentions, is the sausage version of the ever-popular “Turducken.” But Turducken is usually only consumed by people once each year (if at all), around Thanksgiving.

Surely, the Akron Aeros don’t advise eating more than one of these per season, right? Wrong. With each 10-game Aeros package, fans receive vouchers for 10 Three Dog Nights.

To quote Aeros assistant GM Dan Foust:

“So, it’s conceivable that we’ll have fans who eat at least 10 of these next season,” said Fouts [sic]. “And if they want to eat more, then more power to them.”

Well, I suppose if you live in Akron for any extended period of time, it’s pretty much preordained that you’re going to kill yourself. You might as well do it in delectably delicious style.

(h/t to Al’s Ramblings)

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One Response to “I Need to Put This in and Around my Mouth”
  1. Paul says:

    “I haven’t seen this much meat shoved between two white buns since I mistakenly Googled “Aurora Snow” before a trip to Illinois last February.”

    LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!! Just under the wire for best comment of 2010! Brilliantly done.

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